Readers of my new book, Becoming Better, keep telling me about how powerful and impactful a specific example is in this book.
The example I am referring to is of my wife.
She is someone who hasn’t just become incrementally better, she has become transformationally better.
Here is a quote from the book that conveys this:
“I really feel as if I have had a massive change in myself. I think my biggest change is that I am calmer. I don’t feel like I have live wires exposed and going off internally anymore. I feel more independent, emotionally regulated, and overall, more mature. I don’t get overwhelmed as easily. I feel more proactive instead of reactive to life… I still have room for improvement…[but I] love the progress I am making.”
Isn’t that incredible. That isn’t a 2% productivity jump or a new habit stacked on an old mindset. That is a shift in how she experiences every moment. She is living life at a significantly higher level.
Couldn’t all of us benefit from such transformational improvements? Of course!
But, the problem is that most people do not know how to make such improvements. That is why I wrote Becoming Better.
Here is what I have learned and conveyed in my book:
The Two Paths of Development
Most of us try to improve by adding more knowledge and skills. I call this Doing‑Side development. It’s valuable—who doesn’t want a bigger toolkit?—but it has an invisible ceiling. New apps can’t fix a sluggish operating system.
Jena chose the less crowded path: Being‑Side development. Instead of asking, “What else do I need to do?” she asked, “How can I upgrade the way I am?” When your internal operating system elevates, the apps—your habits, relationships, and decisions—run faster, crash less, and unlock features you didn’t know existed.
What Being‑Side Growth Looks Like
- Calm replaces chronic reactivity. Emotional triggers still appear, but you meet them with agency, not alarm.
- Proactivity eclipses overwhelm. The future invites design instead of dread.
- Maturity amplifies independence. You carry your own weather, so external storms don’t dictate your day.
If those outcomes sound familiar, it’s because we see them in the stories of people like Brené Brown, David Goggins, and Edith Eger—individuals who stopped merely improving and started becoming. Their breakthroughs weren’t achieved by packing more into already‑crowded calendars; they were sparked by deep internal shifts.
Why This Matters Now
The complexities of modern life are compounding faster than our Doing‑Side can keep up. A better résumé, a new certification, or the latest “morning routine hack” will help—but only until the next disruption arrives. To thrive in uncertainty, we have to live life from a higher platform, not just juggle harder on the same level.
The Invitation
Becoming Better is my roadmap for elevating that platform. It guides you through:
- Diagnosing your current operating system. You can’t upgrade what you can’t see.
- Identifying vertical growth targets. Courage, openness, and sensemaking aren’t soft skills; they’re core system updates.
- Practicing micro‑transformations daily. Big shifts happen through repeated, intention‑filled actions that align Being and Doing.
Jena’s journey is only one example. The book is filled with stories, frameworks, and research‑backed tools designed to help you experience the same calm confidence she now carries.
If you’re ready for more than incremental change—if you want to feel the live wires go quiet and watch your capacity surge—I invite you to begin your own Becoming Better journey today.
👉 Get your copy here: Becoming Better: The Groundbreaking Science of Personal Transformation
Transformational change isn’t reserved for the lucky or the elite. It’s available to anyone willing to develop on the Being Side. I hope to see you on the path.
